So, as I ease Pokémon Go back into my life there's a few things I want to talk about.
First all, I wanted to apologize to anyone who had to witness the heated side of me through out all of this. Seizures hit me personally so it wasn't just a “broken game” issue to me. I should never have to be in a situation where a video game makes me concern about the physical well being of others.
That said, the degree I expressed it in was wrong. I don't condom the harassment of others, and deep down I never did. But I did villainized the entire company for that single mistake and showed sympathy towards the wrong side. I had no idea how badly the people who always try their hardest to give us of the community a voice within the company where being mistreated by that very community. So to the few people that saw that side of me, as brief it was, I'm sorry I wasn't a better person and I will work towards improving myself to be the better person I want to be.
I'm not fully on the side of the company still, but I don't condom hate towards individuals working there over it. In my heart, that bug should of never happened in the first place. I feel like proper playtesting could have easily avoided this issue. Something that I feel puts human life at risk felt way more important and urgent of an issue to me than just "the game is buggy and laggy" or "Ninatic is taking away this thing I like". That's why I was angry and frustrated in a scenario when I usually show patience towards the company. It doesn't justify my anger though and I hope that I can make up for any negativity that may of leaked out of me, especially for the community.
That said, I still think I need some more time before fully coming back to the game and especially to the community. May just pop in every now and then to share positive vibes where I can. There was a little withdraw at first, but taking a break from the game reminded me of just how much of my attention it demands and how much better for me it would be if I didn't make it such a high priority in my life. Raids, constant events, coordinating lucky eggs and other friendship things with people who were strangers to me, Go Battle League politics, it's apparently how the stress of those little things were adding up. I want to revisit this game for the reasons that got me into it in the first place. Encouraging me to go out to parks and walk when my lifestyle currently has little motivation for it otherwise and helping my more causal friends with the game.
To better reflect that I think I'm going to change the way I handle the content I do online and for that will need more time away from videos/podcast, especially Pokémon Go related. But I'll save that for another post.
PS: Forgot to add that the two main things that Ninatic would need to do to fully get me back on board with the game is
Make a blog post apologize for the oversight regarding accessible for light sensitive people.
Promise and show proof of actually testing out new updates (events as well would be a bonus) in-house before releasing them out to the players. And no dropping it off to Australia and then fixing it when they start to complain does not count as "in house testing".
I got a feeling these two things are never going to happen so I'm not going to restrict myself until they do but figured I'd get out what I need to see to fully reestablish my trust with the company. Again, don't want the things I still feel about Ninatic to give off the wrong impression. I'm much more at peace with the game than I was and once more ITS NEVER OKAY to hurt other people.
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